It's funny to see people die in space.
Okay, that may have sounded a little creepy.
No, I don't take pleasure from watching poor, helpless men suffocated to death while their blood flows out from a several gaping laser holes.
I went into too much detail. I guess I'm a little crazy.
I meant it in the way of how they're stuck in the position they died in. Some of them are really funny. Like that one guy who saw that he was basically dead and just flipped the bird. There's Bert. His name was something weird, Herbert I think. So to be nice, I shortened it for him. Anyways, Bert got stuck in an eternal wave. It's nice to see him when I wake up. Always waving... Then of course there's all the other guys who have their hands clenched around their necks, trying desperately to keep the air in themselves from escaping. Of course, that didn't work as well as they hoped.
Oh right, I forgot to say how I survived and how my home is now part graveyard. Simple. Mikey. We were messing around one day when he pushed me into one of the locked boxes. These stuff were definitely military grade. They had keypad locks, a valve sealing it tight, and two giant metal bars locked with voice codes. I always wondered what was in those. Suddenly I was tackled upon. When I asked what the heck that was for, he replied with "I'm thirsty and we're all outta Quantum, get some more!" At the word 'quantum' the box unlocked. The metal bars detached and the whole door popped off. The valve and keypad were for show, it seemed. Of course, being as nosy as I am, I looked inside to find a single button. There was a note on top that said: "Listen Troy, this is the last shipment of drones I'm giving you. How do you manage to only melt half of your ship when trying to land on a sun? Anyways, this is really, really simple. Hit this button, the drones will do the rest. Got it? No? Your funeral..."
Score one for team... Er... I'll think about that. Anyways, when these bounty hunters arrived, we hit the button. The effects were beautiful. Picture three ships, missiles locked onto a single, defenseless ship. Suddenly, turrets spring out of boxes all around it. Missile, laser, plasma, ion, even a turret that fires boarding drones. A moment of silence. Then suddenly, all the turrets begin to unload. Gigantic breaches are made in hulls, shields evaporate from ion cannons, a laser cuts through the helm of one of the ships. Boarding parties attempt to fly towards the ship. Boarding drones intercept them and blow holes through both ship and crew. While all this happens, two young men have a lovely steak dinner and an aged wine. Suddenly, the carcass of a long dead ship crashes into the other ships. The explosion is huge, different colors streaking against the cold, dark space. Mikey smiles and says, "Roses are red, violets are blue, when this is over, there will be nothing left of you."
"Violets aren't blue."
I leaned over and stole a part of his steak.
"HEY! GIVE ME BACK MY FOOD!"
"Make me." I promptly stuck my tongue out.
He promptly leaped over the table to get was rightfully his.
Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:22 am
Hello everyone! Sorry about being gone so long. Had to get my head functioning again. Took a vacation, saw old friends, slept in all day yesterday. Happy to see Josh is still going strong. Thought of this story over steak dinner in California. I also set fire to part of my house, so me and a horde of friends saved the bonfire of a garage with water buckets. It was scary and really fun. My throat hurts from yelling and laughing. Don't worry Josh, your best buddy Vino is fine!
I view the internet as a fire, and I am the tender of this fire. There are many like me, and we all have the same cause. To feed this everlasting fire.